How deep is your love?

I was delighted to be asked to blog from the CIPD HRD  #CIPDHRD13 this week.  I have tweeted throughout and you can read my tweets on the #CIPDHRD13 backchannel (get me, all social media terminology).  There has been some great blogging during the event; I am still reflecting  on what I want to say, that you might find interesting.  This is where I am at on afternoon two.

How deep is your love?

Well, go on – tell me.

A bucket load?  A heart full?  A life’s commitment worth?  An exploding teardrop powered by love blasting into space?

Do you know what percentile your love for me love sits in compared to mine for you?

Does your love feel so strong that you could conquer the fluffiest cloud, or does it feel so special that you want to keep it as your own tightly clasped secret, your own inner jewel that sparkles just for you?

Do you know if you’re loved?

Do you know who you love?

A message I have heard in different places this week is about the ROI on L&D, capturing and PROVING the business benefits of the relational aspects of change.  We have to get better at measuring this stuff.

Do we?

How can you quantify my potential; my potency, my possibilities?  Because if you really value me, every message you transmit to me will tell me that.  You will be congruent in word, deed, tone of voice, body and I will know.  If you do not really care what i think, then I will know that.

If I know you value me and respect me as a human, I may be able to take more risk, offer up new ideas, be brave enough to say “I don’t know”.

If you genuinely want to explore my perspective when you consult me, I will know that you want that exploration, and that because you have listened to me, and I have been able to express my vulnerability, hope, joy, fear, emotionality, I may have courage to face the uncertain and still strive to be my best.

You cannot measure my potential because it is unknown.

My challenge to business leaders is to measure your own effort and investment into the relational aspect of your role;

How much time do you spend listening as opposed to speaking

How much time do you spend pushing your agenda as opposed to exploring others’?

How much respect do you offer in comparison to the respect you expect back?

What do you need more of to prove that love, compassion, respect, listening, creating time for people to think will allow them to be more?

Measure how much time you spend articulating the” right answer” as opposed to giving people time to internalise and examine changes that directly impact them.

Measure how much time your boss gives you.

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